Our Song
by Domestic Servant
Summary: Sasuke is given the task of finding a song he and Sakura can dance to at their wedding. Naruto helps, Kakashi walks on air, and Sai breaks and enters!
1. Chapter 1

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"Marriage is an adventure...like going to war!"

_- G. K. Chesterton_

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"Neh, neh, what's your and Sakura's first dance gonna be to?" Naruto nudged Sasuke, the groom-to-be of the ever surprising Sakura Haruno. Surprising meaning that _she _proposed the two (Sasuke and herself) to just get married already since Sasuke was too much of a self-loathing pansy to buy her an engagement ring and ask himself. After all, she wore the pants didn't she? She might as well pull all of the weight around, including that of their unborn child which the two _just _found out they were having. And yet Sasuke still didn't have the brains to propose. They were likely to have a bastard spawn had it not been for Sakura's initiative. And _those _were her exact words.

As if Sasuke was so useless around the house! In his defense, he was always away on missions. Apparently, A-N-B-U meant _nothing _to Sakura. _Apparently._ But that's beside the point; what matters now is finding a good song for their first dance as a married couple. It was a task Sakura found to be simple enough even for a simpleton (which he always said he was _not,_ and he backed up this statement with his Anbu achievements) like the Uchiha to be able to accomplish. Really, he was thinking that he should start standing up for him and his intelligence, which _was_ undoubtedly present (in his opinion). He _was _the number one rookie of their year all those years ago. And one mustn't forget that there can only be _one _number one rookie of the year for each year. _And,_ in case anyone had forgotten, he was in the _Anbu_. That counts for something right?

"I don't know," he finally responded. And he really didn't. He wasn't one for the soft cheesy songs that were always the obvious choices for the infamous dances. And he didn't want to get anything too explicit or overbearing, either. He had a feeling a song like that wouldn't bode too well with Sakura's folks.

"Hey, at least you only have to worry about pleasing one set of parents!"

"Get out of here, Sai." And thus, Sai left. How he even got into his and Sakura's house, he didn't even want to know. Of course, he was invited to the wedding, much to the annoyance of Sasuke. But he couldn't help it if Sakura had grown a tasteless and utterly distorted friendship with the socially retarded and tactless Sai. Though, coming to his defense only for the joy of pissing Sasuke off, Kakashi would go into a speech on how Sakura was currently in a tasteless and utterly distorted _intimate relationship _with a socially retarded and tactless man named _Sasuke (I assume you know of him, he'd say)._ And that everything bad in a platonic friendship with Sai would be magnifed by 10 times, plus, when one adds in the fact that it's Sasuke rather than Sai, well, that just says it all. After all, Sasuke is an Uchiha and everyone know's Uchihas are crazy to some degree, most likely from all of the hairspray fumes, Kakashi would reason. Becuase one isn't just _born _with hair like theirs. And Kakashi would know, since his hair took an average of three hours to do each and every morning. _And people wondered why he was always late._

"Maybe you should get this one!" Naruto pointed to the computer screen. As the best man, Naruto took it upon himself to assist in the menial task of finding a song for his two to-be-wed friends, which Sasuke found _quite _humiliating. Sasuke would then protest that he could do something this easy_ by himself _because, in case he'd forgotten, Sasuke was an Uchiha _in the Anbu _and Uchiha can do things _by themselves. _E_spe_cially if they are in the Anbu.Yet, clearly, Sasuke just proved to Naruto and anyone else eavesdropping in a ninja-like fashion (because they _were_ ninja) that he couldn't find a measly song by himself because he couldn't even come up with a valid reason as to _why _he can do it by himself without pointing out the fact that he was in the Anbu, which was used so many times that it has now long since lost it's value. Therefore, he needed help, which Naruto was nice enough to loan his best friend. Yes, _loan. _He _was_ going to get this favor (however unwanted) returned, and it _was_ going to be in the form of ramen. And _lots _of it.

Sasuke looked at the song Naruto was pointing to. "No," he deadpanned. If he chose that song to be played at his and Sakura's first dance...

Well...

_There would be blood._

"Aw, come on. We all know you and Sakura had sex for the first time to this song!" Naruto punched Sasuke in the shoulder good-heartedly. "_It has some good memories attached to it!"_

Good memories indeed.

_..._

_Not._ Said 'good' memories included inconceivable amounts of alcohol, acid, Rock Lee sans the jumpsuit, bondage toys, ice cubes, candle wax, and finally, Gaara's sand gourd. Needless to say, the event _would _have been long forgotten thanks to all of the alcohol consumption...

_But Naruto just had to have the wild urge to play directer and film the whole thing in all of his idiotic sobriety._

So Sakura and Sasuke were forced to relive that experience every single year on their _First-Had-Sex-Together_ anniversary. Obviously, Sakura destroyed the copy shortly after it being shown to her, but that conniving little Uzumaki had made hundreds of them and he even went so far as to use the tape as blackmail. Like, seriously, what a freaking jerk.

"If we play that song, I'd die, and you'd possibly be severely injured," pointed out Sasuke in a non-pointing-out manner, since he was an Uchiha and and all. Yeah, they don't _blatantly_ _point things out_. He leaned back in his seat surveying the list of songs that were presently present on the screen. "Scroll," he ordered Naruto.

"Pah, fine, fine. But don't even think I'm your lapdog or anything. This scrolling business is a one-time deal, okay?"

"Idiot, Sakura and I are only gonna be married once, _any_way," spat Sasuke.

_And then there was silence._

"Awe, what a cute little statement! Especially coming from your mouth, Sasuke!" Sasuke facepalmed his...er...face and whipped his head around dramatically, with a glare in place, towards the newcomer, Kakashi. The man had decided to pop his head right into the room the boys were currently occupying through their window, regardless of the fact that the window was reinforced with dual-sided eveything-destructive proof glass. Of course, Kakashi used to be in Anbu, so any effectiveness that glass ever had was now invalid thanks to Kakashi's aura of ex-Anbuness.

"I know! Why don't you try looking underneath the underneath!" said Kakashi in his 'teacher's voice.' He leaned on the sill of the window frame with his forearms and looked expectantly at the two boys. "I'm sure she'd hinted at something when she gave you this mission."

"This isn't a mission, dumbass."

"Oy, sensei, what in the hell are you standing on?" Naruto wheeled around to face Kakashi on his wheeley chair (he'd called dibs on it first) and looked at the man in a confuzzled and inquiring manner.

Kakashi's mask widened a fraction from his smile. "Nothing!" he chirped. Yeah, he _was _awesome.

Suddenly, their attention was directed elsewhere when Sakura's 'mom voice' sailed through and up the stairs and into the room. "_Sasuke Charles! I know you're not doing anything constructive in that room so I took the liberty of asking Tsunade to make this a real mission. It's an A rank, because I know how stupid you are about the damned ranks, but if you DON'T do this correctly, you WILL pay. Literally."_

Her voice was followed by a slammed door, signalling her leave. Sasuke slammed his forehead on the wall.

"Go_dammit_!"

"I _told _you it was a mission!"

"Shut _up."_

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**I assume there's gonna be a part two? But I kinda like it ending right here. Ngeh, I'll just go with it :) **

**So, I'm really into SasuSaku right now...hahaha. I kinda love that pairing almost as much as SasuNaru, yay. All right, so yeah. The usual, leave reviews and stuff! They make me giggle.**

**Cheers**


	2. Chapter 2

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"Your heart is my piñata."

_-Chuck Palahniuk_

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Sakura, returning from running her ever-so-important kunoichi errands, waltzed into her house, up the stairs, and towards her and Sasuke's room, expecting her groom-to-be to prance into her arms and show her the song he chose for their first dance. And of course, _it would be a song that she adored like so. _

"_Sasuke!_ My darling, dearest, sweet, loving, hardworking, manly, commited_..."_ Sakura walked into the room in which Kakashi's head was poking through a window (_standing on air from the outside),_ Naruto was spinning around in his wheeley chair, and Sasuke was glaring kunai at his computer screen. (He was still pissed from the fact that Sakura had the nerve to make this song-hunting business a damned A-ranked mission, which was _hours _ago) "..._NOT-BUSY, SLACKING, EFFEMINATE, LAZY, DUMBFUCK, IDIOT FIANCEE!" _She rammed her fist of fury on the wall, which did nothing to deserve her punch, to get the attention of the three men. So her fantasies did not come to life, and Sasuke didn't prance into her awaiting arms, but this!

_This behavior was outrageous! They weren't doing a damned thing!_

"Sakura-chaaaan!" announced Naruto. He waved boistrously in her direction, thinking she'd wave back since he did absolutely nothing wrong, but was met instead with a look of anger that was so devastatingly scarring that he swiftly dropped his hand and wheeled behind Sasuke as a _meat-shield _of sorts. Theoretically, every devastatingly scarring glare that Sakura directed at Naruto would be absorbed by Sasuke instead.

_Theoretically._

"I've tried it," whispered Kakashi from behind his hand in a ninja-like fashion. He was, of course, referring to the _Use-Sasuke-As-A-Sakura-Glare-Absorber-Meat-Shield _gameplan that Naruto had previously put into action. "_It doesn't work."_

_"Shut. The hell. Up," _seethed Sakura. Her other fist (that didn't crush the innocent wall) was wrapped around the doorknob and, somehow, it started to flatten slightly at the immense pressure her hand was giving it.

"Yes, ma'am," said Kakashi, saluting even though ninjas didn't really salute. Yeah, he was_ that _frightened.

"Now. Sasuke." Sakura smiled at her husband-to-be. The doorknob was now nowhere to be seen, as it had been compacted and was being held captive in her fist. She walked slowly towards the Uchiha. "Can you please explain to me why you're sitting here, doing _God knows what_, when you _should_ be searching _painstakingly_ for a fucking _song _that we're to fucking _dance_ to at our fucking _wedding_ that _I_ have to fucking _plan _all by my fucking _self _because _you_ are too much of a fucking_ incompetent loser_ to do _anything_ more _challenging_ than _downloading_ a fucking _song_ off the fucking _internet_."

Sakura took a breath.

"_AND YOU CAN'T EVEN DO THAT!" _she shrieked.

Kakashi, still traumatized from Sakura's previous interaction with him, wished he was not awesome enough to stand on air so that he could leave. But alas, he was burdened with the talent of being able to stand on air and was stuck at the Sasuke's window sill. And Naruto was still hiding behind his meat-shield that was really actually Sasuke. Though he _didn't _wish he wasn't awesome enough to call the wheeley chair before Sasuke. He liked the wheeley chair!

"I can _so_ find a song. I just haven't found _the _song," said Sasuke. Wow. He _was _cool after all, huh? Sakura's eyes, which literally had fire in them (the green kind of course) dimmed down to a nice shade that _wasn't _associated with fire or anything remotely hot. Or cold. Oh yeah, he sure knew how to work Sakura.

_In more ways than one. Harharhar._

"Oh, Sasuke. You are _such_ a sweetheart!" Sasuke nodded to himself like he'd just snagged a hot chick at a hot club. (He was engaged though, so his nodding was completely metaphorical). He glanced at Kakashi and Naruto with a look that said, _Yeah, I just de-bipolarized Sakura. _Kakashi and Naruto stared in awe and gave the brave man two thumbs up.

What a guy.

"I cannot believe I _ever _doubted you. I'm just so excited, you know?" Oh God, Sakura was tearing up. Sasuke held back the urge to roll his eyes. She was _so freaking emotional. _He glanced over to Kakashi. Of course his teacher would have all of the answers. Dur. He was his freaking _sensei. _Kakashi did some elaborate shoulder shrugs and eyebrow twitches and eye blinks which ultimately told Sasuke that Sakura was having hormonal changes due to her pregnancy. Ah, yes, so _that _was the infamously discreet Anbu sign language that was universally known by all Anbu. Naruto nodded to himself as he observed the now ongoing conversation between the ex-Anbu and the Anbu and decided he wanted to try out some moves himself.

"Naruto didn't take his me-eds." And in danced Sai, who was in the house _again. _He pointed and laughed at Naruto who looked as though he were having some form of an epiliptic episode. "What, are you trying to speak _Anbu?" _

_And thus cue everyone in the room to point and laugh along with Sai, with the exception of Kakashi and Sasuke, who were pointing and laughing in Anbu-speak. Because they were that cool._

Kakashi was patting his head in a violently fast tempo and twitching his head in Naruto's direction while squeezing his eye shut, as was Sasuke. Yes, laughing in Anbu is quite an odd sight.

"Is that why Anbu don't show emotions?" asked a freaked out Naruto. He had never seen anything more horrendous in his life, save for Sakura's devastatingly scarring glare. He now understood why laughing and crying and the like were a no-no to the elite ninja.

"Sure is. You should see their rendition of crying. It's like they're humping air," said Sai, who was leaning on the doorframe in an amazingly cool manner. He tipped his head down and looked at Naruto through his sunglasses that he was suddenly wearing. Naruto was blown away by Sai's aura of awesomeness.

"Can we please get back to the problem at hand?" snapped Sakura. Kakashi and Sasuke aborted their silent giggle-fit, Sai pushed up his sunglasses and entered the room fully, and Naruto swung his wheely chair in Sakura's direction.

"How about we pick _this_ song?" Naruto scrolled the computer screen up a few inches and pointed to _that song._ The atmosphere in the room dropped a few hundred degrees and Kakashi decided he that, yes, he _was _glad he could stand on air. Why? Because the air he was standing on was nice and warm and his toasty bottom half cancelled out the fact that his top half was freezing. He starting patting his head again in a sadistic manner to convey that _he _was the only warm one in the room. Oh, Kakashi, you feind.

Sasuke slapped his forehead at Naruto's stupidity. He was going to get a_ beating_ thanks to the dumbass demon-container. Sakura sidled up to Naruto and smiled at him in that pleasantly evil manner that all moms and wives seemed to do when their children or husbands were either being A) dumbasses or B) annoying/embarrassing and said, "Naruto. You're going to die soon :D"

And yes, the smiley was present. Naruto gulped. "I was just...kidding?" He loosened his tie, which wasn't really there because Naruto doesn't even know what a tie is, and gulped again.

"And nobody's gonna know who did it..." she sang in a sing-song voice. "Or how, because you'll be so mangled. They _won't even recognize you."_

Sasuke, wanting to distract Sakura from telling Naruto about his impending death by her hands (_hey, he wanted to be the one to cause Naruto's passing, thankyouverymuch), _clicked a random song on the screen, hoping and praying to the dead Hokage's that it was a good song that Sakura would like.

Everything silenced (including Kakashi's head patting and Naruto's gulping) as the computer's speakers began crooning a sticky acoustic guitar. A whining, quivering voice started above the guitar: '_This is the first day of my life. I swear I was born right in the doorway...'_

"What kind of shit is this?" Kakashi vocalized.

"Word," agreed Sai.

Sasuke wanted to say something similar, but he hadn't the chance because Sakura bounded up to Sasuke, hugging him so fiercely that he was afraid of dying by unintentional asphyxiation, and squealed: "_Oh, Sasuke! This is the one! This is definitely our song!"_

Kakashi snickered (like a normal person this time). Haha. He was gonna dance to a pansy song, were his thoughts. Sai's were no different and Naruto was still shocked from Sakura's threats. He wasn't gulping though, which, he guessed, was a start on his journey back to normality. Whatever that meant. Oh, Naruto. Your thoughts are always an enigma.

Sasuke didn't know whether to curse the dead Hokage's or not. On one hand, Sakura was happy with the song Sasuke had chosen (which was com_plete_ly an accident). And on the other hand, the song he accidently chose was the most wimpish song he had ever heard in his life. Save for that Celine Dion song from the Titanic. Not that he could complain as he _thoroughly _enjoyed the movie, whether or not he said that out loud after watching it (which he didn't).

_Oh, Jack. Why did you have to die?!_

Sakura pulled away from the (literally) bone-crushing hug, and he gasped for breath, certain that at least one of his ribs was sprained. He was more shocked, however, when Sakura grabbed both sides of his faces and kissed him. Right in front of their former teacher (who read porn), their former teammate (who had porn-worthy ninjutsu), and Sakura's other former teammate (who dressed and talked like porn, if that was even possible. It was for Sai, at least). In other words, they were now having a lovey-dovey moment in front of the three biggest perverts of Konoha.

"Awwe, Sawsukay's getting all wuvvy-duvvy wif Sakuwaa," cooed Kakashi in a baby-lisp. Sasuke wanted to turn and glare at Kakashi, but he was too involved with Sakura at the moment (ahem) and didn't want to piss her off by stopping. Hey, he wasn't complaining. He made a series of eyebrow twitches and and leg kicks (he was speaking in Anbu, of course) in Kakashi's general direction, telling Kakashi that at least he _had _someone to be lovey-dovey with. Kakashi dropped his head in a less-than-dignified manner and started Anbu-weeping at the window sill. From the villagers below, it looked like he was having sex with the side of the house.

Poor Kakashi.

Sai and Naruto's attention was diverted from looking at Kakashi in his state of depression when Sakura shrieked, "_Oh yes, Sasuke! There! There!" _Huh, less than 2 minutes had passed and the two already seemed to be getting freaky.

"Get a fucking room!" yelled Naruto, who was now throwing rotten cabbages at the two. Where did he get the cabbages, you ask? Sai, of course!

"Idiot, we _are _in a room. Now how about _you _get out," snapped Sasuke from the bed in which he and Sakura were doing _unspeakable _things.

"Yeah. Or at least go downstairs and entertain yourselves. And don't forget Kakashi," added Sakura.

"And don't eat the tomatoes!"

Naruto and Sai sighed dejectedly as they gathered up Kakashi who was suddenly longing for a wife and went downstairs to watch some television and eat everything in Sasuke and Sakura's kitchen that wasn't a tomato.

And they all lived happily ever after. Except for Kakashi. He remained single for the remaining of his uncharacteristically long shinobi life, watching everyone he knew get married and have children. He couldn't even get a whore pregnant.

Poor guy.

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**All right, there's the conclusion. I hope it was okay, ahaha :)**

**Tell me what you think! Btw, the song that ultimately ends up as Sasuke and Sakura's first dance is 'First Day of My Life' by Bright Eyes. It's really good.**

**Ciao!**


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